By Kalvin Valdillez, Tulalip News
Have you heard about the new program available to Tribal families through Tulalip Family Haven? Centered around Tulalip traditions, stories, and activities, the Cultural Parenting Program helps connect families to their heritage and ancestral teachings while also providing a space for teens and parents to grow together and address issues they are facing within the family unit.
At its essence, the Cultural Parenting Program was specifically designed for families with adolescents between the ages of 10-18, who are currently experiencing the difficult trials and tribulations of youth that many Indigenous teens face while growing up.
Family Haven Director, Alison Bowen, shared, “We were often seeing that families that had guardianship of children, when they hit ages 13 to 16, there was an increase in issues for the families – between the youth and the adults being able to communicate with each other. And what I was hoping for is that we could create something that had those really good hands-on techniques for helping families maneuver around difficult behaviors, by using a cultural lens, reflecting on traditions and tribal knowledge of raising children in our community.”
She continued, “The goal is for families to feel better prepared to deal with issues and resolve them in a way that feels good for them, but also to think about how to prevent issues from coming up. The program focuses on youth who are having difficulties, whether they’re having problems at school or whether they’re arguing with their parents all the time – and just supporting the youth through those troubling teenage times.”
By combining two successful evidence-based programs, Positive Indian Parenting (PIP) and the Positive Parenting Program (Triple P), and implementing a healthy dose of Tulalip culture, Family Haven has curated a 16-session program that will help strengthen the family’s communication and their overall bond. The program is tailored to each family’s needs, and though the topics of conversation and issues addressed will vary from family to family, the lessons and exercises are all based around the Tulalip way of life.
“We’re aiming to have16 sessions over a six-month period, so we could build a deeper connection between me, the parents, and the youth,” explained Cultural Parenting Specialist, Andrea Coberly. “I’ll be having those one-on-ones with the parents and the youth separately and then together. And sometimes I’ll help by giving them prompts to talk about. One of my favorite sessions is the cedar paddle exercise where I go in and explain a canoe to the family. A lot of these families don’t necessarily have that direct tie-in to the culture, to the traditions. I have pictures of a canoe that is full of people. I explain what a skipper is and then I have them envision a scenario where they’re the skipper, the canoe is their life. Who are your pullers? Who is going to help you navigate the rough waters?”
Andrea also stated that throughout the program, the families will also learn about traditional plants and medicines, as well as attend a drum making class. Family Haven will also incorporate a number of stories into their curriculum that is sourced from the elders at the senior center, helping those important and educational Tulalip stories live on.
The idea behind the program is that by integrating ancestral knowledge into modern day parenting plans, the families will gain a new perspective on their ongoing problems and develop a better understanding of where some of those issues historically stem from. And through that understanding, they can find common ground and build a strong foundation for their relationships going forward.
Said Andrea, “The way that I explain it to them is, let’s start at the root of the problem, which is what our ancestors went through, what our great grandparents and grandparents went through. So, the boarding schools, and how that experience has trickled down to how we’re parenting our kids now, with all the negative discipline tactics. How can we work through to remove those? How can we create positive ones? How can we acknowledge what has happened to us, but also forgive our parents, knowing that they went through this as well? How can we work to stop that cycle? We’re focused on really building upon the positive. And those interaction skills will create better bonds between the family, so the youth feel supported and empowered.”
Enrollment is referral-based, and you can be referred by beda?chelh, the Family Wellness Court, Family Services’ substance use disorder program, or by filling out a self-referral form online. You could learn more about the Cultural Parenting Program by contacting Family Haven directly at (360) 913-7357 or (360) 716-3284. You can also visit their website, www.TulalipTribes-nsn.gov/Dept/FamilyHaven, for further details, as well as access their universal referral form.